William Booth once said, “I’ve found my destiny”. This was the beginning of what is now known as the Salvation Army (1865).
Destiny – for a while I have pondered, just what and where is my destiny? Like William Booth, I think I have found it – or at least, am now on the way to where I am meant to be heading … for the journey has to begin in the mind. By making a decision and then to put into place the actions required to fulfil it.
For years I have struggled with feeling unsettled. I had put this down to having spent a lifetime moving around to different towns and cities. Forever destined to be a gypsy, or nomad.
I have tried to settle in different places, and almost succeeded – but then for some unfathomable reason I would either jeopardise, or manage to sabbotage (almost) my stay in that place. I moved from place to place, and therefore from job to job. Every job was interesting, they all had their good points, and by adding new abilities and skills to my repertoire, I never considered any of the moves a waste of time. In fact, I enjoyed the lifestyle.
But still, my spirit was ‘unsettled’.
Over the course of the last few weeks, and more so, this past week, this feeling has grown to a crescendo.
My job is going well, I managed to take back the old position of ‘second in charge’ of my department – the people on my team at work are great. I enjoy my job. Yet, I couldn’t shake the feeling that it isn’t where I’m meant to be long term … its not my destiny.
While I was away up north last weekend, I visited a place where I used to live (see previous blogs). During the course of my time there, one of my friends shared a picture she had for me. This wasn’t a physical picture – more of a ‘word of knowledge’ for me.
She saw a picture of me in a comfortable cardigan – it was old, but cosy and warm. Yet, there was a problem with it. I had the cardigan on inside out.
I was the only person who couldn’t seem to see this. People around me noticed that although the cardigan seemed to fit, it wasn’t quite right – it was in the wrong way. Yet, no one was either keen, or willing, to tell me about it. (Some did try but were rebuffed. I had good excuses! )
Once I took the cardigan off and put it on the right way, it would fit me perfectly and be just right, she said.
We walked on in the walk, and I pondered this for a few days, I prayed that God would show me what the cardigan was, and the steps required to put it in the right way.
Last night in conversation with another friend, it came to me like a bullet. Shook me to the core. I know what that cardigan is. I know my destiny. I know what I am meant to be wearing and it isn’t a New World uniform (well not forever, anyway!).
There are steps required to move me to where I am heading. Big steps, possibly some uneven steps, but I know that they will work out. For I will know when the cardigan is on right. The fit will be perfect because Jesus knows what size I am. Others will finally stop looking at me in bewilderment. Some may even clap and rejoice 🙂
They will rejoice with me – knowing that although its taken a good few years, at last I am moving in the right direction. For the peace in my heart and the joy in my spirit can only be a confirmation. Only Jesus gives that sort of inner peace.
“The steps of a good man (or woman) are ordered by the Lord and he delights in their way. Though they fall, they will not be utterly cast down for the Lord upholds them with his hand.” Psalm 37 v 23
God’s desire is to walk with us. He has ordered our path, watched our steps and kept us from danger. He wants communion and fellowship with us. When you are walking according to the will of God, He will direct your path and give you direction. God’s way is always the right way. He knows where He is going. He knows the end from the beginning. The greatest thing you can have going for you in your Christian walk is to have God order your steps. (H. Maudlin)